Someone just let out a lot of toxins from the past and shared them with me so I can help her focus on positives. Clearing the path is so important!! At some point, it’s important to vent the crap so can get through to identifying the next steps.
I believe it’s important not to confuse the result with the commitment. It’s helpful to focus on small wins – part of learning to depend on oneself one day at a time, to count on oneself – to build for bigger steps.
Change – even if it’s for the better – is scary. I like to take fear around the shoulder and say “OK, fear, let’s go!” And there are other steps I find helpful.
I observe myself to learn how I learn, how I take on new challenges, how I approach life, how I develop a new habit. I do that with small habits I want to develop and change. Then I know what to expect of myself and my process, so I can be patient with my process when I decide to start something new that is bigger.
Instead of feeling bad about my lack of follow-through on a project I haven’t completed, I can observe my behavior and start again with no judgment. Why would I start anything again if I’ve judged myself harshly? I don’t want to feel bad again when I stop again (which I probably will…). Correct and continue!
By having a focus, it’s possible to see how other intriguing things fit into it and support it. I may question whether the direction is really the one for me. I find that I don’t have to know the answer to that question. “More will be revealed” as I continue in the direction I’ve set for myself. My path will shift over time, and looking back, I’ll see how it happened without my even realizing it. My focus needs to be right here, right now.
While it’s easy to get lost in the past and the future, I find I can’t really get lost in the present. My reminder to myself is to stay in the now, in my present – the present that is a gift to me. And in that I can be stable, focused, safe.